He broke up with me over skype. Then the Goddess found me...

About 4 years ago now, I was in Hawaii, on the island of Kauai to be specific. Lush paraside surrounded me, I was interning at a beautiful farm owned by a world-famous raw nutritionist. High vibing people were around me, and I had access to some of the best nutrition in the world.

… And...

…I was crying every day, and in waves... was deeply confused in my soul.

My boyfriend of almost 3 years had just broken up with me. Over skype. While I was traveling in Hawaii alone.

Everywhere I went, and everyone who I talked to encouraged me to let it go, and get on the high vibe train. “Set goals, visualize what you want!”

The (lovely and well-meaning) crew at this farm encouraged me to do a liver & gall bladder flush. I was truly interested in feeling better and getting healthier, especially in the midst of this breakup, so I tried it out.

1 day into the cleanse, which required me to be on a juice cleanse for a few days to prepare for what was next… I found myself in the kitchen, making a piece of toast.

“Fuck it!” I said. “This doesn’t feel right. I need nourishment. I am in a foreign place, alone, and my partner just left me. I need some emotional comfort.”

In some ways I felt like I’d failed. And on other ways, I knew I was onto something.

A few days later, I was in the library at this farm, and among tons of books focused on cleanses, clean eating, and purity… I found one book that seemed different than the rest. It was called “Healing Wise” by Susun Weed. In the moments when I opened that book, and started reading this wild woman’s wisdom, my life changed.

Susun explained many things to me, which I won’t quite getfully into in this blog, because that might take a while… but the gist of it was this: Clearing and cleansing has it’s place. But it is the masculine way. It offers only a part of the whole.

The feminine way, the wild woman way, is nurturance. Support.

The wild woman honours the chaos, loves the richness of soil, and getting dirty. Wild primal sexuality, and honouring the dirty depths of living is the wild woman’s domain. Break the rules. Eat the bread. Make tea with the weeds. Be in your blackness.

Your pain is your medicine, it is meant to be cycled back into gold, just as an animal's poo is circulated back into a tree and produces new life. The Goddess supports you in all ways.

It was like a sigh of relief. And honestly, I really wish I could convey the wisdom that came to me that day, because I feel like that paragraph doesn’t quite cut it, but those are the words I have right now.

From that moment on, the Divine Feminine, the Goddess, the Mother… entered my life. Or perhaps, a better way to put it would be - I embraced her.

I dove into my connection with the Moon, I started exploring my sexuality & my moontime (menstrual cycle) much more deeply, and I started making plans to move to the place I’d always wanted to live… but my boyfriend never did… Vancouver Island.

Since then, I have deepened into the Goddess’s medicine profoundly.

 

I have remembered I am Priestess, and have served the Goddess in many lifetimes.

I have realized I have come to dismantle patriarchy, and remind the world of the beauty and sacredness of the dark.

I have remembered I am the daughter of Isis, a Goddess revered in Ancient Egypt and beyond. I have remembered past lives in Egypt, and Greece. My world started to make a lot more sense. I got a lot clearer on my purpose, and what I was and am meant to be doing in the world.  

• I started hosting Women’s Circles every New Moon for my community.
• I began singing and sharing my voice much more freely, because I honoured and acknowledged it as my medicine.
• I threw the “good girl” chains off, and awakened my powerful sexuality.
• I made friends with many other Priestess sisters, and we get together on holy days to do ceremony.
• I continued to grow a “business” that deeply serves the collective, nourishes my soul, and takes care of me financially, because the Goddess has shown me... that is my birthright… that is my truth… to be deeply supported, and to be deeply expressed. I'm on the growth edge of this, everyday.

 Also...

• I have pissed people off along the way.
• I have cried deep tears at the state of the world.
• I have agonized with grief for my brothers and sisters in the animal + plant worlds.
• I have witnessed sisters while they deeply cried, and began releasing lifetimes of turmoil.
• I have felt deep rage at Patriarchy.
• I have gotten real.
• I have shown up.

I have gotten fierce.

I am on a mission.

And no one will stop me.

No one will stop US sisters, because we are the Goddess and Her time is NOW!
We are her hands and ears. We have come here to do extremely good work.
And the world is ready.
It needs it.
It is crying out to be loved.

I want you to know the Goddess path is not the path of Patriarchy, shiny things, and false promises.

It is not a path I will say to you “Oh girl, come with me and all your dreams will come true! You will make 10k a month, you will get that super hot guy/girl in 1 month, and have the perfect relationship, you will be happy all the time, you won’t feel pain anymore because you have cleared it all out!”

Sorry to be a bit aggressive

but… Fuck that shit.
 
The Goddess path is real.

Human AND Divine Embracing. If you know what I mean.

The Goddess path honours ALL the rays and frequencies of life & death… Not just the clean, white, shiny, acceptable ones. YES, as powerful women seaSTAR, we can and WILL create abundance, have amazing relationships, feel beautiful, and so much more!

But we will also cry, get angry, and get real about the very real tragedies that are happening in our world right now.

And we will have the clarity about what to do about it. We will feel empowered as we gaze into the mess, because we know we are here to help.

And we will have our sisters, and the Goddess to support us.

If you are called to deepen into the Goddess.
If in reading these words, something is triggered, and your soul is inviting you to go deeper.

I have a special invitation, love...

...

I invite you, dear sister, to join me for a Moon Goddess Initiation - a deep dive into your Divine Feminine energy, so you can unblock yourself, express your deepest gifts, and come alive to the Goddess within.

Imagine what it would feel like, to be fully expressed in this world?
 
...To honour your gifts, and share them wildly and freely?
...To claim your sexuality, and allow yourself to take up space in this world?
...To be clear about your path, and know where you are meant to go.

 

In Moon Goddess Initiation, we will be unlocking that for you, with the help of the Goddess.

Sister, this sacred journey includes:

• 6 months of private coaching
• Meditations, myths & history about 6 Goddesses - we will be working with one a month. (Brigit, Hathor, Aphrodite, Kali, Isis, and Aine) - Learn more about them here.
• 2 Goddess Boxes of Earth-friendly beauty + adornment products I’ve made myself (Which include: Mermaid Moon Anointing Oil, Sacral Chakra Perfume, Golden Cosmos Lip Gloss, a Moon Necklace, Greek Goddess Eye Shadow + Cheek Highlighter, a Moon Sticker and a Cedar Smudge Stick)
• A 30 minute follow up session
• A feature on my website after the journey has ended
• And 2 bonus gifts, one being a discount on the price of the journey, and the other being a 7 part series through the chakras called “Becoming the Healer You’re Meant to Be”

 

All the details of the journey can be found here.

I would love to have you in the journey, if you feel called.
These are sacred times, indeed.
We are called to awaken deeply.

xo

This is an opportunity to experience a spiritual transformation that will shape your life, FOREVA!

You will be saying yes to awakening the Priestess within, remembering past lives that will inform your mission in this current one, unblocking issues with abundance, confidence and sexuality, and SO much more.

The result will be that you are deeply connect to, and living your purpose. Expressing your soul’s gifts, and making the DEEP impact on this planet that you long to.

Please go here to learn more about the journey sister! So much is awaiting you!

Lots of love!

xo Beth

Tempted to cut someone out? Here's what you need to hear...

One of the most important lessons I have learned is... When someone triggers me, irritates me, angers me... They are showing me a reflection of the pain that lives within... And if I am willing to show up for the assignment, I will thank them, instead of blame them, for showing me my unprocessed pain.

How many times have we wanted to cut people out of our lives because they anger or trigger us? (I am not talking about serious abuse here... Though that is a reflection too, but would need to be dealt with, with physical space from the person, yes)

How many times has the same pattern, the same energy- shown up in our lives again & again, even though we've cut the person who has triggered us - out of our lives?

You may find you keep repeating the same patterns with love interests.

You might find you keep attracting the same stories in your friendships, or in your career.

These patterns beg us to feel our pain. They show us the way- if were brave enough to pay attention.

They invite us to- instead of blaming someone, fully acknowledge self-responsibility for having this show up in our lives. We manifested it. We've perceived it that way.

This is not easy.

Self-responsibility is not encouraged in our culture.

But when we take the initiative... When we honour the pain we see in the external world as a reflection of the pain that lives in our individual and collective psyches... We now have the chance to heal it.

The obnoxious girl that always one ups you... Is a trigger to feel your unprocessed pain from childhood.. Having never felt truly seen or heard because your big sister always got the attention.

When that pain is felt.. Truly... and released... That girl's voice suddenly turns neutral... You actually start to find her funny + realize she's actually really rad.

And what's more... All those potential triggers that could have come your way.. Now no longer have a hold. You can open up to people. It feels good.

You have felt your pain.

You have transmuted it.

You have found your freedom.

This is deep work.

It will take courage.

And most people will never do it.

But you aren't most people.

You are a goddamn warrior.

And you will heal.

Enter Your Divine Ray ~ Let The Shadows Ignite With Love

The Divine ray has come,

To pierce through all of

your illusions,

The ways you cling to your shame and cry,
"Not me! Not I! I have wronged!
I am not whole, not innocent!"
The shadow, perceived as deeply real,
As deeply right,
And you,
Deeply sure,
That you,
Are not enough.

You await when the divine ray will come deeper,
And see,
The truth of who you are,
Of what you hold deep within,
And turn away in disgust,
Huffing and hawing as it whispers,
"Not you, you are not ready,
For the feast of unconditional love,
You are not Pure,
Enough."

And yet,
When the time came,
For the Divine ray to illuminate all of your shadows,
She turned to look at you,
Awake in Her beauty,
And instead cried,
"Oh! My child!
This,
Is gold to me,
Thank you"

And then, she swept you,

On a tide of gold, red, and white,

To the infinite bounty

of your beauty,

Showing you,
That in truth,
You are deeply human,
And deeply not,
And your shadows,
Are the compost,
That will heal the world,
When transmuted.

Thank you for your shadows sweet sisters and brothers,
The time has come,
That we may set them free,
And be washed in love.

---

---

Intense Like the Monsoon Rains

Intense. 

It runs in her veins.
She's tries to cradle it. 
To hide it + keep it. 
But like a raging river swelling up higher, 
In the monsoon's all encompassing rains,
Her fierce determination to feel,
Is all there is,
Is all there will ever be. 

It will take her over,
Eat her up,
Spit her out,
Ravage her soul, 
Uproot her life.

And there on the ground lying, 
Thirsty for understanding, 
Broken with despair, 
She rises, 
And without a pause, 
She'll keep walking, 
She doesn't care. 

Because She knows there is a place, 
Beyond time and space,
That She is serving.

The echoes of her family, 
Etheric, but real as can be, 
Ripple in and open her,
To her mission, 

Of raw authenticity.

---

Standing In That Power

No more: "Where is he?"

Just,

"I AM Here!"


Standing in that power. 
Being whole and complete.

Receiving from the earth and sky.

No longer asking why.

Just saying, "Thank you"
And letting it be.

That's what it feels like, to be free.

Everyday is an opportunity, to stand in that.

To let go of the "not enoughs"

And fully ground into me. 

Soul Connections + The Ones We Love

Im feeling pretty raw right now, and I'm going back on forth on whether I just need to meditate and go for a walk, or write, but deep down I know writing is going to be cathartic, and this post... at the very least it will serve me, but likely it will serve many of you who read it + who relate to the depth of feeling coming up for me right now. 

...

This morning I had a dream.

After e-mailing one of my dear soul brothers (whom I haven't spoken to in months) --- he showed up in my dreamtime, along with his little family. 

We were at some sort of convention or gathering that hundreds of people were attending, and I found Dave with his baby daughter I have yet to meet, and his beautiful partner. I knew I loved this child deeply from the moment she entered this world, and as I was not lucid in this dream, I truly believed I was wrapping my arms around her for the first time. As I held this little baby, deep tears, from a very deep place, welled up within me and poured out. 

It was so good to see my beautiful soul friend and his baby, and as I explored the convention, I found more of my soul friends, all from my community in Calgary. I left a few years ago after a breakup + so I could be with the ocean, and live more deeply in nature. 

As I saw them one by one, I felt happy, excited, and at peace. I felt deep emotions. And as dinner was being served at this convention, I went to sit down and get my plate... but I couldn't find my seat. All the seats were taken, and then, as I looked for all the beings whom I loved... I realized... I couldn't find any of them. They had disappeared. I knew they weren't there anymore. 

Deep grief welled up within me, and my tears bridged the gap between the dream world and this reality.

I woke up crying, and opened my eyes to my bright yellow room, and a cloudy day. I was back.

I knew of course, why I had this dream. (Well I think I do anyway...) 

To let go of some of the grief of not being present in my soul family's day-to-day lives. To let go of grief. To open that much further. And to become reminded of just how important it is to reach out. 

...

For anyone who has let themselves experience the depth of a true soul connection, you know the kind of depth that I'm talking about. 

We go through this life meeting friends, acquaintances, co-workers, and yet... there are a handful of people who transport us to another place, another state of being, just by being around them.

We know we know them from... somewhere... we're just not sure where. 

The truth of my experiences with these soul connections so far is... some of them honour and embrace you. And you grow deep friendships rooted in a lifetime of love for each other. 

And some of them leave before you even get started, because they can't handle the intensity.

Because they can't handle that you are a girl, and they are a guy, and they have a girlfriend, and they're not sure what it means to have a connection so deep with another.  As I searched for more examples... I realized that this is the only time I've had true + deep soul friends not show up for the friendship... When they are in a male body + they've been so conditioned by culture + society to believe that it is wrong to have emotions for any other female that is not their romantic partner. 

...

I am so thankful for my soul friends. The really intense ones... there's only a handful that I've met so far, but them just being on this earth with me makes me feel more at ease. 

They help me to know that I'm not crazy for believing and feeling into other worlds. That the kind of other-world experiences I feel subconsciously truly do exist, because here they are, in front of me, their eyes + hearts opening deep portals to spaces and times I can't see, but I feel. They connect me to the Universe in a bigger way. 

...

So this morning, I wrote that soul friend an e-mail explaining my dream and how much I loved him. 

I messaged a new soul friend that has come into my life and made it clear I want to connect with him.

I'm about to finish a painting I'm creating for another soul friend that has recently entered my life,  just to give him some of the magic, I see him giving everyone else. 

Basically... I'm reaching out. That is so important. 

My loves, if you have soul friends right now in your life, and you're in any way scared to let them know how you feel... reach out.

Go past your comfort zone and get straight. Be real. In all likelihood, they feel it too, and maybe just don't know how to express it. Those soul connections will make up the fabric of your life. They will be the people you raise your babies with, or the people you see once a year, but whom are with you in your heart everyday. They will be your supporters, your lovers, and the ones who you can think of when someone is not being very nice to you. You'll be reminded that you are truly loved, wherever you are. 

Please don't be afraid to jump in, and connect. 

In my experience, some of them need time, they get scared, they shut down. But even those ones, they still circle my field. They're still present in some way, because they feel it too. And I feel it is truly a matter of time with those ones, that the walls get broken down, and they too, will enter that space of my truly cherished ones. 

We are all equal. We can love anybody and everybody.
But we also have very specific connections for reasons still unknown to us. 

So let this be a HOLLA to our soul families, our micro ones, our macro ones, the human family, and may we all one day, open up to the power of connection, emotion, and energy, that runs through us as souls. 

Lots of love,

xo Beth

---

Kelsey Grant of Radical Self Love // How She Started Her Healing Business

This post is the first in the 'How She Started Her Healing Business' series, where 7 inspiring young entrepreneurs share the story of how they created their holistic careers - giving you inspiration, advice, and a window into how you can do it too!

This post comes to us from Kelsey Grant, the founder of Radical Self Love. She's a self-love coach, author, speaker, and musician, whose positive energy is infectious. 

Why I love Kelsey:

Kelsey is a living breathing inspiration that a constant state of bubbling happiness CAN exist. Ok, I'm sure she's got her bad days, and she shares about those too, but overall, you can feel her positivity and love for the life brimming through every blog post, every picture, and every facebook update. She's like an energizer bunny of luuurve!

Why I love this article:

The story of how Kelsey got to where she is really shows the process. It is not overnight that we uncover what it is we truly want to do, nor is it overnight that we become 'successful' at it (whatever that means to you). I love that we're able to see the twists and turns. The A-ha moments. The first company, the growth period, and the evolution. There are always adjustments we make as entrepreneurs to our creative process, and to our business. It's always a work in progress. Through reading this story, you'll get an idea of how this work is a journey, and not a destination.

---

 

Entrepreneurship wasn’t ever really on my radar.

I didn’t grow up dreaming of running my own business or doing anything close to what I am doing now. In my earlier years, my dream was music. I had it that I was going to make music, write music, produce music and perform.

Then something within me shifted. I presume it was an accumulation of all the knowledge from my undergraduate degree, paired with living out this pursuit of music and being in a relationship where I felt that something major was missing.

A year before my relationship came to its completion I had a reading with a psychic medium. In this reading, my entire paradigm was shaken up. He told me I would not be pursuing music but rather a more spiritual path. A path that would lead me to being in front of massive crowds in stadiums but instead of music I was speaking. At this point the whole world of personal development, spirituality and public speaking was completely out of my scope of reality.

In fact I refused to accept the vision he offered. My stubbornness kicked in and I went back to my relationship convinced I could make it work. A year later the relationship was complete. I had left the band, left my studio and embarked on a wild journey of self development which ultimately lead me to where I am today.

My path was kicked off with a trip abroad. I knew I needed to learn more about myself and begin to relate to myself as someone who was strong enough to be independent.

I had become so reliant on my relationship and my identity of a musician, I wanted to actually get to know who I really was underneath it all.

 

Little did I know at the time every choice following my breakup was a foundational brick of what I now teach– Radical Self Love.

I took myself on a trip across the world. I travelled solo to South Africa, the UK, Spain and Portugal. This trip had me face one of my biggest fears– being alone. I did meet up with friends along the way, but there was a lot of time rocking solo where I learned how to rely on myself, my intuition and my power of positive belief. Even before I entered the world of spirituality and self growth I unconsciously knew that expecting a positive result would yield one.

This trip was one of the most terrifying things I have ever done and one of the more freeing and fulfilling ones. After that trip, I knew I was here to do something significant I just didn’t know what. I had felt a pull to move away from the city I grew up in and start a fresh new chapter in a new city where I didn’t know anyone.

After returning from my trip abroad, I knew there was something within me that required some healing and attention. I didn’t know how to uncover it myself so I enrolled in a personal development program called Landmark Education. After the first two courses I had repaired my relationship with my parents, come to a peaceful resolution and completion with my former partner and I was ready to take the big leap into this unknown chapter of my life.

Two months after the second course I moved. I packed my car and drove to the coast. I had no plan, no job and zero clue what I was going to do next– I just knew I had to be there. Once arriving I enrolled in the final course in the Landmark Curriculum For Life. In this final course, I was to build a community project that inspired my soul and left a positive impact on the community.

This project set the stage for everything that was to come in the next five years. The program had me get out into the community, meet new people and create connections that to this day are still active in my life.

The project activated a dormant passion within me– the journey of relationships, self expression and the human capacity for connection. 

---

 

The Conversation That Changed Everything

 

In one of my final coaching calls with my coach in the program, she asked me something that would forever change the course and direction of my life. She asked me if I had ever considered being a coach– as a profession. 

I said no and asked her why she said that. Her response was another question. She asked me if people often came to me seeking advice or counsel.

I responded yes. To this she asked another question. She said “and when they ask for your advice do they take action upon this advice and create positive results for themselves?”

I thought about it and realized yes that was exactly what would happen– especially when it came to advice on relationships. I could see things that were unseen, interpret situations and navigate circumstances to come out with a win-win for both people. When I said this all to my coach she said “Consider you are already a coach and that doing this professionally would be of great service to so many people”.

That conversation was the tipping point for me. It changed the way I looked at myself.

It sent a surge of inspiration through my soul. I felt incredibly aligned.

Upon coming to this realization, I knew my path was to become a professional life coach. I signed up to coach the program I had just completed to gain some major insight, practice and direction. It was also at this point in time I co-founded my first company. I paired up with a friend of mine to create All In Coaching. To this day I still have fond memories of this creative process and the passion it ignited in both of us. 

Starting this company was exciting, it felt like for the first time I was doing what I was really here to do.

I was in flow. Meeting the exact people who held the answers to my questions. Attracting circumstances to practice my craft. Aligning with my soul family who would support the unfolding of this entire process. Everything began to align and it felt like magic. It was unlike anything I had ever felt before. While it was exhilarating it was also terrifying. My mind was not yet at the level to hold the wisdom my soul knew.
 

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The Path of Soulful Entrepreneurship

I did not have the mindsets and the heartsets to fully embrace trusting the universe, cultivating abundance and allowing my divine guidance to lead the way. At this point, my ego mind was still predominantly running the show and so it was at this point that my journey inward began. I like to think of it as my soul path initiation phase.

This was a five year phase that tested me to the max. It filled me with divine inspiration. I was lead to the most magical of places. I had the honour of meeting incredible humans who helped me remember the innate good that exists in everyone. I also had to come face to face with the depths of my shadow. Come into acceptance of my beliefs of lack and limitation in order to transcend them.

In this five year phase I cleansed my mind, body and soul. I tested different types of coaching in my practice to see what worked for me. I learned that a predominantly logical, rational and left brain approach was far too restrictive for me and lacked inspiration and excitement. I also learned by swinging to the opposite end that a purely metaphysical, spiritual and esoteric practice lacked the grounding and practical application that had me feel clear and stable. So after 4 years of serious learning, growing and healing I came to realize my role here is to be the bridge between the two worlds. I have a gift of interpreting the omens of the Universe, reading the signs of the spirit and communicating them in a way that makes sense in this physical dimension. In the simplest terms I help people bridge the gap between spiritual wisdom and the practical application of this wisdom. My calling is to teach love. To support people in having harmonious relationships with others by first having a kick ass relationship with themselves. Coming to this realization has been a journey.

The thing about the process of entrepreneurship is that it is a journey of the soul.

A time when you will be challenged, tested and brought to your edge. There will be so many days where you want to give up, where there doesn’t seem like a solution will ever present itself. It is in those times your soul is waiting in anticipation for you to keep choosing your divine path. Each time you surrender to your higher path you instantly become present to the miracles around you. In those dark nights of the soul you are at a metaphorical crossroads. You are being given the chance to choose what is safe, familiar and will cause the least amount of discomfort OR you can choose the path of the unknown, the path of the soul, the path of infinite bliss, abundance and grace. 

Most people want the end result of entrepreneurship without having to go through the inner and outer transformation it requires.

 

To be the type of person who can hold the expansiveness of your souls vision, takes some serious egoic purging. All of your beliefs will be challenged, all of the things you think you know will be turned upside down, all of your relationships will be re-examined and all for your highest good. To live the life of your soul path means some things and some people must be left behind. Not because you don’t love them simply because you have grown to a place where they have served their divine purpose for you and you for them. 

Letting go is a HUGE aspect of following your dreams. You will learn to let go of lack, limitation, fear, obsession, jealousy, judgement, reaction and attachment and exchange these for abundance, unlimited potential, love, intention, acceptance, compassion, response, flexibility and free flowing, detached awareness.

To embrace our brilliance we must cleanse out all that weighs us down, all that holds us back and everything that we have unconsciously accepted as truth without challenging the thought form that brought it into our minds.

Everything we manifest on the outside is a direct reflection to our inner world. To have the clarity of thought, vision and become a direct line for inspiration to flow through you all of the lower level shit has to go. We have to completely re-learn how to look at life, relearn how to see beauty, relearn how to believe in things working out, relearn how to have faith, relearn to see others as their greatness.

While the path of following you dreams and answering the call of your soul will not be easy it will be the most incredible, fulfilling and magical process you have ever had the courage of embracing. There is something within you the world needs that only you can provide.

---

 

A Couple Gems To Help Along The Way

1.  Ask for help. The answers are always there if you have the courage to ask.
2. Surround yourself with people doing what you want to be doing. Learn from other entrepreneurs in similar fields. These people will be a huge factor in keeping the faith when you most need it, they will also encourage you to keep following your calling because they understand the journey.
3. Everything that happens is the perfect thing to happen. Learn from the contrast. Extract the lesson and keep moving.
4. Your gift is precious and it will emerge as you create the internal conditions for it to thrive. Taking care of your emotional, mental, physical and spiritual wellbeing is essential during this journey.
5. Your mindset is EVERYTHING. Your attitude about the unfolding of your path will be the difference between an ordeal and an adventure.
5. Be open to things turning out way better than you could have ever imagined.

---

If anyone had told me five years ago my life would have included:

1. Starting a coaching company.
2. Learning subconscious reprogramming technology and basing this technology as the foundation for company #2.
3. Getting onto national television with company #2.
4. Studying numerology and being contracted as a numerologist for a year.
5. Starting up my third company with three other women teaching Goddess Spirituality workshops for a year.
6. Becoming an event coordinator for one of the most sought out personal growth/game changers event in the world which would give me the tools, insight and network to run an online business platform.
7. Open another coaching company where I solely worked with high level leaders in the corporate world.
8. Launching a year long music project where I would learn a new chord, write an original song with the new chord and put it on Youtube- which would lead to the most amazing and unforeseen gigs.
9. Co-hosting a year long Youtube show which used humor as the vehicle for spiritual transformation.
10. Closing down my coaching company for 6 months.  
11. Re-opening my coaching company after a 6 month hiatus with a complete re-branding into Radical Self Love, completing a 365 Radical Self Love blogging project, writing and facilitating a course on Forgiveness and another on Numerology and Relationships, releasing a 30 Day Radical Self Love info product and writing a book…

I never would have believed it. But it is how it has all unfolded. It looks nothing like how I imagined it. My life has turned into a magical paradise filled with the most interesting characters, incredible opportunities, deep soul growth and an inner peace that I completely attribute to having arrived at my soul path. It took five years of exploring and I’m certain the path ahead holds more unknown twists and turns– and knowing this I still wouldn’t trade it for anything.

If you feel an urging in your soul to follow a different path, honour this calling, go at a pace that serves you and no matter what tune into that gorgeous heart of yours because it will lead you to the most magical and enchanting places. You got this gorgeous!

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!! 

Kels

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About the Author:

Kelsey Grant is a Radical Self Love coach, speaker, author and musician.

She is fiercely passionate about teaching people how to love themselves more. She is greatly inspired by the possibility of a world full of people who are fulfilled, on purpose and resonating in the beauty of love filled, harmonious relationships. 

Kelsey offers Radical Self Love, Relationship and Love Alchemy coaching one to one or with couples. Her first published book "Sabotaged Love: The 12 Archetypes Keeping You From The Love You Want" has just hit the Amazon book shelf. This book is a precursor to the launch of her flagship program "The Alchemy Of Love" which is set to launch early 2015. 

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F*ck it, I Want A Man! ( ... The Story of an Independent Woman)

Lately I’ve been on a meditation kick. Like a serious one, haha. (Think, 2+ hours a day. I know. Who am I?) I’ve discovered Theta wave meditations by Kelly Howell, and they are designed, with the tones and vibrations they use, to put you into the dreamlike state of theta consciousness - which is where you can access deep guidance, and even uncover alternate paths for the direction of your life.

There are two areas of my life that I’ve been reflecting on a lot lately. Maybe reflecting is the wrong word. More like zoning in and doing some deep digging. 

These two areas? Money and men. Yep.  

Money as in - “How can I attract and receive the finances that I need to do all the things I want to do? Like travel, and buy land so I can live off grid. Like eating the best diet ever and wearing a wardrobe fit for a fairy?”

Men as in - “OK, I want to manifest my life partner, but so many people around me say it’s not right to focus on that. You have to wait for it to find you, and you have to find total self-love before it can magnetize. Might as well have some fun in the meantime!”

But as many of you can relate - there comes a time where so-so connections and ‘fun’ no longer hold any sway. At all. Believe me - I was a make out bandit in my University days. Literally. That’s what my friends called me. A make out bandit, hahaha. And while that was completely healthy for me at the time, and offered me a chance to go explore and see what was out there, after a while, I was ready for something more. (Also, I stopped drinking at that time, so that might have had something to do with it)

About 4 years ago I magnetized a relationship that was a lot more than just a quick connection. It was deep, soul level love, and I wanted to keep going into it. And into it. But he broke up with me a few times, over a few years, and by the last time, when I was traveling solo through Hawaii, he broke up with me over skype... well, HAHA, that pretty much ended it. 

Since then, I’ve been battling internally and I haven’t even been fully aware of it. 

So today, I went into a theta meditation, not so much to focus on the money side of things, though I’ve received a lot of great guidance around that lately too. (Namely - that my action steps and my bank account are a lot less related then they may seem. Magnetizing money is about the energy you’re in)

No, today, I went looking around in my subconscious for clues about a dream I had last night. In it, I slipped a man a piece of paper - essentially a contract that said he had permission to be with me. The magnitude of this connection, and that we’d be ‘allowed’ to explore it, was so much for us, that though both of us were so stoked, he left the dream, and I woke up. The energy was too powerful we needed a chill! I couldn’t sleep for the next hour. 

But what was that part about permission? About being allowed?

Don’t I know that I’m allowed to fall in love? 

Apparently not. 

I’ve been single for the last year and a half. And I mean really single. Not the kind of single that you see someone for a couple weeks here and there. But like, really effing single. Like my cat and I have grown quite close during this time. 

Ok, back to the meditation and the permission thing. 

Why have I not attracted a partner during this time? Even though I made it clear to the Universe that I wanted to fall in love - where was it?

WELL FOLKS, WE HAVE A THETA PARADIGM SHIFT UPON US. 

(Also, I just made up that term)

In meditation today, I got this -

I have been raised to think and believe that STRONG, INDEPENDENT WOMEN were the bees knees, and they don't need no man for no thang.

‘Get your career going, get sorted financially, and then maybe have a guy around after for some enjoyment when you’re all ready and mature. ‘

And then, the spiritual side of things, when I started to read and explore that...

‘You need to love yourself FULLY before anyone can love you. You can only be in healthy relationship if you are absolutely whole and independent, and don’t rely on them for anything. Then it’s all groovy if you two merge, cause you’ll be whole beings. Whereas before, not so much. You’ve gotta have self-love down to a T before you can do that.’

... Well excuse my profanity, my meditation told me so delightfully to FUCK THAT SHIZ. 

Ladies, I am about to say something that might shock you a little bit, as it did me a bit. 

YOU ARE ALLOWED TO RELY ON YOUR PARTNER. 

You are allowed to intertwine with someone else. 

You are allowed to have a twin flame. 

You are allowed to merge with someone. 

You are even allowed to DEPEND on your partner (and oh dear, did a part of me  squirm when I wrote that... still got some independent woman no man no thang busting to do)

WHY?

Because we are uniquely designed to long for each other.

For a partner. For a family. For a community. It's the stuff we're built of. 

We’ve become so obsessed with separateness and independence, that we really have forgot - we really do need each other. Community is the all healer, it always has been, and it always will be. 

Just like a baby can literally die if it does not get enough love and skin to skin contact after it’s born, our souls too, can shrivel if we don’t receive the love we need. 

The divine works through people. 

This man that I adore, and I want - I am allowed to give myself permission to want him. And more than that, to be with him. To rely on him. To co-create with him. (Whoever he is)

Even though some of my beliefs say - it’s totally pathetic to want a man. You’ll never get one with that energy, I now, beg to differ. 

Wanting a man is natural. (Or wanting a woman for that matter)

I want to create a life with someone.

I want to intertwine.

I want to fully embrace my humanness, and accept that we as humans, AND we as souls, need each other. 

And that is completely OK. 

I’m still working on opening up these beliefs. Man, that independent woman thing is deeply engrained. But now that I can see it for what is is - a shield so I don’t get hurt, an excuse to not go after what I really want - I can be a little freer. 

Writing this post was meant to resonate with those of you who are in the same spot I am. WANTING it, but not giving yourself permission to have it. 

In any area of your life. 

So share a comment below!

Do you allow yourself to have what you want? Do you feel like it’s wrong to want a man? Do you feel like you have to be fully self-loving before you can be with an out-of-this-world partner? Or are you rocking it out, and have some wisdom for the rest of us?

Let's start a conversation!

Lots of love!

xo Beth

Ps. Go here for the link to the meditation I did today!

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